Idolers!!
Despite the boring solo performances (Crystal was okay), last night’s show actually entertained me. In hindsight I am equally amused and annoyed by the six movies that were represented on Movie Theme Night: Batman Forever, Free Willy, Once, The Graduate, Caddyshack and Don Juan deMarco. Really?? These represent our best/important/inspirational movie theme songs?? Okay...
But during the show I tallied 5 laugh out loud moments as follows:
1) Ryan Seacrest trying to fist pound/shoulder hug Jamie Fox while Jamie was holding (cater-waiter style) his “contestant” and “artist” shirts. I absolutely love it when Ryan Seacrest is awkward and doesn’t know what do when someone has an unrehearsed prop. Suddenly “Ryan the weird robot-man-leprechaun host” appears – hee! And Jamie’s t-shirts made me chortle but not really laugh – ridiculous! – c’mon Jamie you can come up with something to say to these people besides donning them a t-shirt to categorize them as either boring or mediocre??
2) “What’s it about? A willy?” – (paraphrasing) Simon Cowell after Mike Lynch reveals the incredible movie behind his song selection. Very interesting that Big Mike of all contestants sang a song about an enormous whale living where he’s not supposed to be… Get outta here Lynch! Go back to the ocean of obscurity where you belong! Of course I also snort-laughed a bit when Big Mike haughtily refused the “contestant” t-shirt Jamie Foxx offered after his crappy rehearsal. HA!
3) Kara explaining the plot of Mrs. Robinson after Casey’s rendition of Mrs. Robinson. Kara (paraphrasing): “Well, it’s about an older woman, which you’re thinking is ME.” Oh Kara don’t look so incredulous. HA!! Even the botox can’t hide the fact that you’re reaching the top of the hill lady. And Casey, we know you weren’t smart enough to pick that song yourself for the “humorous” Kara connection. Casey was probably thinking about his 24 year-old teacher 8th grade teacher who taught him about the birds & bees... Even if he’s not a star, Casey is still beyond chasing a Kara.
4) Crystal Bowersox boyfriend Tony in the American Flag pants (sweatpants? house pants?). WTF?!?!?!?!?! LOL!!!! And she actually THANKED him for wearing them? I’m sorry, but if he was my boyfriend I would have immediately rescinded my previous week’s request for him to man up and marry me. In fact, I would tell him to take those pants off immediately and free willy to save some face. Of course Crystal’s outfit was pretty hideous as well – c’mon Idol stylists – we do not want to see tattooed back-fat spilling out from an old Belinda Carlisle outfit!
5) After Casey and Mike’s fairly decent rendition of “Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman” Ellen says, “Yes, I have loved a woman.” HA!!!! Of course she gave absolutely no feedback on the song, she simply relished her only funny joke of the season. But it was pretty good in the moment.
After tonight we’re down to the Top 3 and we get to the hometown parade and the judges’ selections next week, which is always good and usually jerks a tear, especially seeing the macho dads break down over their kids success. So let’s get on with this elimination and get onto some good stuff.
Here’s who YOU think is going home tonight:
Casey 21%
Michael 15%
Lee 15%
Crystal 1%
Aaron 19%
Siobhan 15%
Didi 7%
Tim 0%
Andrew 3%
Katie 3%
Meyer & Abramson – OUT!
P.S. If anyone can get me a picture of boyfriend Tony in the American Flag pants you have earned yourself a guest writer spot tomorrow or next week. Please someone find it for me. I must have it for the archives!